The Confrontation...Life Changing?
Remembering that I have significant technical and investigative skills (ex-RAF Police), I spent time, within the first 24 hours of finding out my wife was being unfaithful, researching who this man was.
My wife, naturally I guess, didn’t want me to know too much about him as she didn’t want me confronting him and the fact that he was “married and had a teenage daughter”!?…oh yeah, was that going to stop me?
Yes, I was angry, disappointed, and shocked that my marriage, which I believed was “all good,” actually wasn't. And while she proclaimed that her relationship with this guy had been “only recent,”…well, considering that I had seen a good deal of their communications via email, that spanned many many months… Hmm.
I learned a lot of information, including his name, address, business, and wife's name.
It was time to strike while the iron is hot!
The very next day, just 36 hours after the revelation, I got myself “suited and booted”, went to the train station and bought a ticket to the City “he” lived in.
My journey on the train, only a matter of an hour, had my mindset reeling from one decision to another…would I tell his wife? was he just a player? would my anger spill over?
I had found out that his business was a popular hotel in the area, just a 20-minute walk from the train station. It was in his wife’s name, so it was not actually his.
Arriving at the access gate to their huge Georgian Hotel, I stood for a moment, part of me thinking I should really turn back and take it on the chin, figuratively speaking…lol
But, no, I had committed to this and wanted to do “something”…anything that may even resolve this massive glitch in my life.
Entering the Hotel and walking into the reception area, I was greeted by his wife.
“Can I help you, Sir?”
“Ah, yes, hopefully…I was in the area and Mark said if ever I was, to drop in and reconnect, maybe even do some business together”.
“Oh, a friend of Mark’s?”
“Yes…if he’s around, any chance of a chat with him…tell him it’s his old mate, Dominus”
“Dominus?…oh…ok, I will go and get him for you” and away she went.
Within just a few minutes, out he came, his face white as a sheet and clearly shaking…of course when his wife had mentioned my name he would have known immediately who I was.
“Hi, Mark, long time no see…thought we could have a quick catch-up and maybe look at some business together like we once spoke of..”
I thrust my hand out to him and automatically he responded with a handshake…now I am a believer in a firm handshake…this was a FIRM handshake, I could almost feel the bones in his hand fusing together and noted him wincing.
“Ah…err…yes….err…let’s go through to the living room..” he stammered and led me from the reception area.
He hurriedly shut the door behind him and then just stood staring at me…he was not a small guy but me being 6ft 3in and built like a rugby player, I guess he would find me a little intimidating…good!
“So, go on then Mark, what’s the crack? What the **** are you doing with my wife?!”
“Please…Dominus….please…can you keep your voice down….my wife…”
“Your wife!? Oh yes…let’s not forget YOUR wife!”
“She doesn’t know anything….not yet…”
“Oh, so you are telling her?…my wife is in a serious relationship with you then? Been going a long while I understand?”
“I will tell her…just need to get the timing right…yes…and yes…quite a while….I am sorry…”
“Sorry?! Ah that’s it then, everything is right with the world….look, you do know my wife has some depression issues? That this may just be a byproduct of that?”
“No…I didn’t know that…”
“Also, looking into your life and business, I see you’re a bit of a flash twat…do not come to my home in your Porsche…never come to my house…do you understand?”
“Of course not…and I…we…your wife and I…we are serious about each other….”
“I think the money and a possibility of a show-off lifestyle is more at play here…but we shall see…I have a lot to think about in what my next move might be…do you understand?”
“Please…please…dont tell my wife…it’s difficult….I will tell her….I am sorry…” his voice was quivering, his eyes staring wildly and beads of sweat rolling down his face.
“And now, you know I can get to you easily…you had better sort things out one way or another…and if this is just a game for you…end it! Or I will be back!”
“Yes…I understand…”
“I will leave you with that thought”
As I left, his wife thanked me for popping in and he just stood, shell-shocked at the door.
“Don’t leave it too long Mark…I’ll be in touch!”
Out into the street and I slowly made my way back into the City, to be honest, I was quaking with rage and yes I so wanted to punch him straight in the mouth…but I knew that would have really served no purpose.
I found a pub and grabbed a couple of beers and whiskey chasers and tried to calm myself. But naturally, I still had as many questions in my head and very few answers. What had I done or not done for this to happen? How had she hidden this from me for months if not longer?
The train journey back was a blur…my head whirling with questions.
Arriving home, I found my wife in a somewhat distraught state.
“You went…went to see Mark?!….You didn’t hit him did you?!”
“I went, yes…I didn't hit him but in hindsight, perhaps I should have.”
“He is going to tell his wife…”
“I doubt that…he’s a player and it will never happen…I don’t want to discuss it further today”
That night, as with the previous night, I slept, fitfully on the sofa…for me an ongoing insomnia wasn’t being helped by any of this.
The next day, I spoke with my wife and made plans for our living arrangements. Basically, she would live upstairs apart from when she needed the kitchen and I would set up a bed downstairs, just until this matter got resolved.
Actually, I never set up a bed downstairs, this was the beginning of several years sleeping on the sofa…that became a norm for me.
Until Next Time
Next Time: Living the Dream or Living in One
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